beejfu | IC Inbox

"Shit." He sounds sad about it, too. "Yeah, the good die young, don't they? They sound like kick-ass people. Way better than any of the assholes I've met."

Yeah?

FAKE WHAT?

Morals! Ethics. Try on a skin suit, but the skin is humanity.

OH!

... NO. MORALS ARE A MENTAL CAGE DESIGNED BY THE WEAK.

Hot take warning.

Maybe the weak need to be protected.

[Politely calling up BJ on the network and asking for BJ to come by his cabin for a chat would be the polite thing to do. But curiosity outweighs politeness, and Norton is curious if the summoning still works.

Also, there's something a little thrilling about summoning a demon, even though it seems that there ought to be more Latin involved.]

Ahem.

Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse.

[Hopefully he wasn't in the middle of anything important.]

[Pop! BJ drops in on his ass into Norton's cabin, giving an annoyed look at him]

What, Antivirus?! Whaddayah want that was so important you interrupted my soaps?

[Norton grins in delight, unbothered by BJ's expression.]

Oh lovely, it still works!

Anyhoo, I recently had a silly curiosity pop into my head and couldn't get rid of it, wondering where a certain ship speakeasy came from and how it exists. Bill told me you were involved. Something about a hidden door, and things...not going well...but we got a speakeasy out of it, so all's well that end's well.

I'll slap you around sexily afterwards if you tell me all about it.

Oh my god, you suck!

[he stands up, brushing himself off]

That's what this is about? Why don't you ask Bill, he runs it!

I did ask Bill. He said that the Barge used to have these locked doors with hidden rooms. The Brew started out as one of those, and you, Entrapta, Rhys, and Rose found another room, which somehow caused the ship to rearrange itself to be the way it is now, including the Brew being as it is now. I want to know what happened. Please? [Norton bats his eyelashes.]

Oh. That fucking thing.

It was just a torture basement, no biggie. Rhys' boyfriend flipped out and started disassembling it because he hates kinks and that made the Barge twist and turn upside down, I guess.

Weird times.

You going to make out with me or what?

["The Barge got angry that its secret kink dungeon was destroyed" was not where Norton was expecting this investigation to go. But it's not the weirdest thing he's ever heard of.]

In a minute, sweetcheeks. [Norton cups BJ's cheek in his hand.] Just one last thing I don't understand, which is how anyone got into the room in the first place. Was it just a matter of finding a hidden door and walking in? Or did it require a key? Secret password? Special knock?