It's not- these things change you. It was just so hopeless. All I could think was how - it was probably better that way. I stopped wanting to be found, I guess? [ martin exhales, frustrated with himself. ] It was -- bloody awful. And I'm being a downer. Sorry.
There's a place Peter sent people to. It's all - foggy, and gray, and cold, and - I think it was like a long beach, I don't remember much about it. Sometimes he did it to people who got in his way, or sometimes he was bored, or just - feeding his Patron. I dunno. It wasn't fun.
[ he bumps bj's leg with his. ]
I just mean - I get the loneliness thing. And I know things are - rocky, between us, but I'm around, I guess.
--oh. [ that throws him slightly off kilter, but he's not unhappy to hear it. ] Thanks. Jon had to put up with a lot of nonsense from me here for a while. That kind of thing sticks in your head.
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[ uncomfortably. ]
No one could see me. I was alone.
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What?
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[ martin shrugs. ]
Peter - he was the Avatar of the Lonely? He, um- I don't know what word to use here. Mentored me, I guess. Isolated me. I let him.
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Heh.
Wow. That's kind of funny.
Like, all this time I didn't think there were other invisible people I couldn't see.
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[ he bumps bj's leg with his. ]
I just mean - I get the loneliness thing. And I know things are - rocky, between us, but I'm around, I guess.
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Oh. Yeah, that sounds like a feasting ground. That's rough.
All sorts of fuckheads know what it's like to be lonely. You know what it's like to have everyone go on with their lives unable to hear you screaming.
I, uh. Respect that.
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You stick with him, baby Hushpuppy. That kind of loneliness will tear you to pieces otherwise.
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[ martin shoots him a sort of embarrassed look, but it's distinctly pleased at the same time. ]
Nice to have people to spend time with, too. I mean -
[ he makes a sort of confused face. ]
I - we're friends, right?
[ he honestly does not know. ]
The murder was definitely an accident?
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...We're friends?
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[ martin seems just as confused by his own statement. ]
We're sitting in a hallway playing with a snake together.
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[He frowns a little, out of confusion more than anything]
Huh.
It's just that this is the first time in a long-ass time where someone else said the 'f' word first.
[Quickly!]
It's great, don't get me wrong, I TOTALLY wanna be friends. It just takes two to tango and I didn't know you felt that way, Hushpuppy.
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[ he's leaning back, rubbing his face - weirdly embarrassed. ]
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[she hisses! no killing!]
Yeah, well. You know. You do one thing for a few hundred years and it's kinda hard to just knock it off.
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Well.
Good. Nice.
And I'll...like, I'll TRY to ease up on the antagonism, but you make the greatest faces sometimes when you're irritated!