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[beejfu]

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[corkscrewed]

Okay, okay, one second to get dressed.

Re: text

[beejfu]

you're texting me without your pants on?

Scandalous!

text

[corkscrewed]

Pajamas.

[ he slept basically a full day after arriving. but give him just a few minutes, and then he'll summon him to his and jon's living room. he looks like he's been sleeping. ]

[beejfu]

[be prepared, Martin. Be prepared to be physically tackled to the couch in a hug by a human who actually smells reasonably decent]

[corkscrewed]

[ he makes a startled noise but drops to the couch just so they don't actually fall. a little awkwardly he pats at his upper back. ]

Whoah-

[beejfu]

Hushpuppy, it really IS you!

[mumbles Betelgeuse from his arms around Martin's neck.]

You remembered me! You came back for...what, a visit? Please say you're here to stay!

[corkscrewed]

[ he's laughing because - well, this is so much more of a reaction than he was expecting. he gives bj's shoulder another sympathetic pat. ]

No, not a visit - never meant to leave in the first place. You look like you're doing well.

[beejfu]

I'm doing amazing! Was I human before you left? Fuck, I can't remember.

[he slides off Martin's body to hit the floor in front of him, beaming]

Ahhh, you're just like how I remember you, though! All cute and flushed and accented.

[corkscrewed]

[ he leans forward, propping his elbows on his knees ]

You were not human, and you're the one with the accent.

[beejfu]

Please! American English doesn't have an accent!

[He drops his head on Martin's knee, hugging his leg]

Surprise! I'm human. Also, a warden, weirdly.

[corkscrewed]

Weirdly enough, I might be a little less human.

[ he awkwardly pats his head. ]

That mean you've stopped beheading people?

[beejfu]

No shit?

You want more human in you? That's a sex joke.

[he gives a contented sigh]

Yep! No more murder for me! What about you? What've you been up to, kid?

[corkscrewed]

I'm good, thanks.

[ he sounds amused more than scandalized, and continues to pet his head a bit like one might a dog. ]

You really want to know? It's a bit of a doozy.

[beejfu]

I do! Tell me.

[he snuggles closer, seemingly uncaring about being pet like a dog. Actually, he kind of enjoys it]

[corkscrewed]

[ if bj's happy, martin seems fine with it. god life on the barge is weird. ]

Okay, so, uh- the apocalypse happened, and we're having to travel through these weird pocket dimensions governed by eldritch fears. But Jon's stronger than everyone else, so it's fine.

[beejfu]

Hah! No way!

Was it zombies? Global warming? Monster attacks?

[corkscrewed]

Um- more like a big culty "remake the world" ritual.

[ he won't mention that jon was the catalyst. ]

[beejfu]

Oh, those guys sound like a barrel of laughs. Is that why you're back?

[corkscrewed]

Yeah. The whole world is kind of- over.

[beejfu]

Whoops!

[corkscrewed]

[ he flicks bj's ear. ]

We're gonna fix it.

[beejfu]

[he gives a rough giggle, nuzzling Martin's knee to hide at least one ear from flicking]

Everybody's out here saving their worlds. You guys ever consider just letting one go poof? Just for the fun of it?

[corkscrewed]

[ how do you remind him so much of his dog!! ]

Yeah? Where am I supposed to go if I do that?

[beejfu]

[if he had a tail he'd be wagging it]

IDK. Here? Another world?

[corkscrewed]

We can't just abandon everyone.

[ a pause, then he sighs: ]

I've thought about it. Wish we could.